Reasons Not to Give Humpty a Chance

10. Ate up crackers, licorice.

9. Uses words that don’t mean nothing, like loopid.

8. Drank that bottle of Hennessy I had on shelf.

7. Likes to bite.

6. Bumps rappers in Top Ten.

5. Likes oatmeal lumpy.

4. Sometimes gets ridiculous.

3. Looks like M.C. Hammer on crack.

2. Got busy in Burger King bathroom.

1. Ruins image, style I’m used to.