Scars of Summer, Volume I

Oh yes, summer has begun, and do you know how I know?  It’s because now that I’m not wearing coats all the time, I have to be more aware of putting on sunscreen so that when I go outside, I don’t end up with a total farmer tan/ sunburn that looks like this:

Yiiikes!   You know that when you start out the summer with one of these, then you actually have to put some thought into, like “I’m putting lower SPF sunscreen on the top, and higher-SPF on the bottom,” so that eventually you can wear a sleeveless shirt without looking like a big weirdo.    I am not one of those fortunate people who can just go out and get a tan, so it takes a few months for me to even get myself to a “summer” like color.  And my legs?  Forget about it.  So white they make children scream.  On the bright side, when I’m 95 I’ll still have the skin of, say, an 85 year old because of my regular sunscreen use.

Here’s the other thing about summer—every year, for some reason, I get a new pair of “summer” type shoes that then end up scraping and scratching my feet into oblivion.  And now I’m going to show a photo that, if you’re grossed out by this kind of thing, you definitely should not “enlarge.”  Here are my feet after I bought new shoes, then proceeded to (unwisely) walk seven miles in – maybe to break them in?  It’s really unclear.  Is there a “summer foot care” guidebook that I missed?

Oh, and if you’re thinking of commenting on the fact that I have a freakishly long second toe that is not unlike the hand of a monkey, keep in mind that a toe of that length can also be used to pinch, sometimes quite painfully.    I’m not saying I actually will pinch you with my toe, but just remember it’s a skill I have (along with hanging upside down from trees and playing the piano.  Just kidding.  But, I know—the toes are long, and the feet are pale.  But I'll thank you to recognize that I've got my pedicure together in time for summer).

Again—yiiiikes!  You know these blisters are now going to have to be taped up until they heal, then I’ll have to have another go with the offending shoes.  If there is a better way to break in shoes, I would love to know it, because I recall spending more than one summer in New York walking around, then cleaning the blood from the inside of my shoes, all because I didn’t want to be one of those women who wears white sneakers to walk around, then changes when they get there.  No no no! 

Comments

[Robert]

I also have the long second toe gene, as well as the quick-growing toenails gene. My toes can do whole karate/dance routines by themselves.

I read somewhere that if shoes fit right, they don't rub and bind, which causes blisters and bleeding. So naturally I find that my feet aren't a match, so buying a pair of shoes for me is like buying a house for most people. It can take weeks.

I think it boils down to you're not so much breaking in the shoes as you are your feet.