Since we’re on the subject of things happening in pop culture, let’s get caught up on some current events that have caught my attention, shall we? Today I seem to have re-acquired the cold/ fever that I had last month, so I have been reading gossip magazines and mainlining Nyquil in an attempt to still be productive. I have my fingers and toes crossed that I don’t have the flu, because it seems like everyone I know has the flu, and I hate getting the flu, and now I am obsessing about it a little bit.
Kim Kardashian is having Kanye West’s baby. Holy mother of crap. If I didn't consider her a marketing genius before, this is the greatest move I think she could make in her career and life. I have always suspected that Kim Kardashian and her mother Kris Jenner are actually the most savvy marketing geniuses on earth, and this latest development only goes to support this theory. Yes, I know she is an actual businesswoman, but let us never forget that what initially propelled her up and over the mediocrity of the masses was a sex tape with Ray-J, a guy you don’t even know or remember. She capitalized on that sh%t! I know, I know, she says she is keeping their baby out of the media, but I think we should really take that proclamation with a grain of salt, because I’m pretty sure this is the greatest collaboration of two complete narcisscists the world will ever see, and I don't think they will be able to go five minutes without selling pictures of themselves with their new baby. Watch for it!
Bethenny Frankel is divorcing her husband. Um, I don’t know if you’ve seen a picture of Bethanny Frankel lately, but I find her to be one of those women with a scary eating disorder face (just my opinion, I don’t know her or eat with her), a shrill voice, and a pushy personality. Have you seen that husband? She is punching so far out of her weight class (no pun intended) with that guy, it’s not even funny. Does this woman not realize how lucky she got to even get that guy to marry her? I predict that she will marry several other men, both of them older, and never find what she is looking for since she obviously has assessed her good qualities completely wrong. Does this sound harsh? Maybe. I’ve never seen that Housewives show, but I know several people like this, so I’ve formed a composite. Also, please do not comment on here that she’s “just too rich and successful and she intidimated him,” because everyone knows she exaggerated her profits from her companies.
Just....Taylor Swift. It’s not that I don’t think she’s talented, ok? It’s that I think she looks like a model and happens to know how to play the guitar, and therefore everything always works out for her, and when it doesn’t, she gets very, very upset, ok you guys? For proof of this, please see yesterday’s post about poor Taylorbot short-circuitng when she lost to Adele at the Golden Globes. Also, why do guys date Taylor Swift? Don't they know she's just dating because she has writer's block and needs to come up with new songs?
In case you think I'm grumpy and bagging on women, I will go ahead and close with my opinion that Channing Tatum seems like a really nice guy, but his face makes him look like he could star in the Crp-Magnon Man Exhibit at the Museum of Natural History.
Send healing vibes, people! FluWatch is on!